So, lets talk about choosing, what does that even mean!?
verb: “Pick out (someone or something) as being the best or most appropriate of two or more alternatives. Or, plump for, go for, take, settle on, decide on.”
So reading this, I mean, it sounds pretty straight forward, right?
You find the best of different scenarios and then you roll with that. But choosing something also means not choosing the other option. And not choosing any of them is still choosing!
Have you ever been in a situation where regardless of what you choose, its not exactly right, or you are too scared to make the choice because of the consequences of choosing option A over option B? I have….
And let me tell you, if I could choose not to choose again, or having to make any decisions ever again, well that would be a relief, right? – Imagine, if life just worked out, and there was never anything to choose between ‘cause everything you wanted in life, was just right there, happening…… but that’s not life, and maybe it would be rather boring, if that was the case. .
So I have often asked myself, “How do you learn, how to make the right choice?” I mean no one ever taught me in school, what it meant to choose or to make a decision, I mean sure my parents explained that I couldn’t both get candy and Ice cream on Friday nights, it was one or the other, but you know what I mean. I don’t recall anyone ever really explained to me, that saying yes to option A means saying no to option B, and what that means. Or, did anyone ever explain to you, how to look within for the answer, meaning; when you are so confused and can’t make up your mind, did anyone then ever tell you what you could do to figure out how to choose the best thing for you?
I’ll share with you, some of the few tools that I have used, and still do, and that works for me.
One thing that I have learned, and regardless of how much of a cliché it’s turned into, I’ll always tell you to listen to your gut, cause normally it already knows the answer. But lets say your gut is “out of order” (which is possible, I’ll get back to that in another post), what can you then do, how do you figure out what is right for you?
One of my favorite tools is the famous “Pros and Cons” list.
Yep, you heard right, I know its old school, but it works! Now, if you are sitting reading this, thinking to yourself, what is she talking about, let me explain it really fast.
You make your headlines, and start listing, like this:
– Family –Bad weather
– Better education – Lower pay
And then, you continue your list like that, until you run out of air, so to speak, and whichever side has the most listings, well, there’s your answer..
Now, you have to write free from the heart, I don’t believe that this is an exercise, which you have to necessarily put a lot of thought into, or overthink. Some of you might be like me, (huge over thinkers) and try to influence the outcome by making up more answers to one side, so that the outcome will be obvious. Let me just tell you this; if that is the case, that you are doing that, then you already know the answer 😉
Option number 2, is the “Vision Board”
So, I like to think of the vision board as a tool for the more creative people, and the pros and cons list is more straight forward. This doesn’t mean that you can’t create a vision board if you don’t consider yourself creative, it’s just to emphasize that the vision board is a “longer” process and at lot of crafting and DIY, so if you don’t consider yourself that, then this might not be the tool for you.
A vision board is a lot of images, visualizing all of your wants and dreams. You decide how you would like to approach it. Normally I try to make a collage and then, ones it’s done, I frame it and hang it on my wall in my bedroom.
First, you figure out how large you are trying to make your board, (go big or go home, right), just kidding, it can be anywhere from 4×20 to a full wall project, again your time, your choice…
I try to create a content plan, meaning, what is my focus with this; career, travel, 5 or 10-year plan, again, there are no rules, you decide. Then I go through my mums old magazines, yes I have one of those mums, who has tons and tons of magazines, but she never really reads them, so plenty of material for me, yay.
You can look for pictures and inspiration online too, but I guess I am an old fashion Gal, and I like the whole cutting out the picture etc..
Ones I have all of my pictures and quotes or whatever I felt inspired to put on, then I go find whatever canvas or cardboard I wan to use, then I start gluing.. And voila, you have your vision board.
The process itself can be very therapeutic, but the board is not going to do its purpose, if you don’t hang it somewhere you can look at it, that’s why I hang mine in my bedroom, then it’s the first thingI see in the morning, and the last thing I see at night, I guess that it helps me stay focused.
I hope that this was helpful, either to you, a friend or a family member, and remember, no matter how tough the choice is, you are the only one that can make it, and its okay to take your time, but at the end, you have to make a choice, because even if you don’t, you still do..
With Love Everyday